Wednesday, March 7th

Hey everyone. We have an inordinate amount of audio for you tonight, so the show should be pretty damn entertaining.

7pm: Last night the guys asked for the Ultimate Geek argument. They admit that they called the geeks to come out and call us. Of course, in the two hours and forty-five minutes we did this, they spoke to two girls. I'm surprised even two called. Of course, one was hammered, so I don't know how that fits in. Our wonderful webmistress Mindy will have the poll for this up tomorrow.

So, during the geek discussion, Magic vs Dungeons and Dragons came up. Of course, I had to bag on the kids who stayed in the library during lunch to play Magic. These kids were the biggest nerds imaginable. Evan in El Cerrito writes in to express his distress at my hatred of Magic. Of course, his email just plays right into my argument.

Clementine in Oakland dated a Magic player. They were living together and one of the things that precipitated their break up, was him blowing the rent money on a card for the game. Jacob in Suisson says he played Magic in high school in order to make friends. What an error in judgment that was.

Brad is ridding himself of a geek shirt that he has. It is an old Star Trek shirt with a blueprint of the Enterprise. It is from 1989 and far too small on him.

Throughout the night, we will be playing ads from 50 Greatest Local TV Commercials compiled by PhatPhree.com. First up, is for Stinky Septic, #48 on the list. Oh man, that is great jingle they have.

Shockingly, Amy in Fremont calls to defend Magic. I can't believe that we have a girl, no less a sorority girl, who played. She says it is like poker with special powers.

Todd asks us if we have ever seen Reefer Madness, so of course we have to play a clip.of it. Man, that movie is fantastic. The amazing part to me, is that the guy gets high his first time smoking the reefer.

In honor of Captain America's death, the guys play the awesome song "Captain America" by one of my favorite bands, MOE. Captain America was killed in the latest comic that came out yesterday. He was leaving the courthouse, when shot by a sniper in the shoulder and stomach. What does this mean for our country? Apparently, the sniper was a woman with whom Capt. America was romantically involved. Oh my!

8pm: Chris asks what it is about 13 year old girls and horses? All girls that age seem to go through a phase where they are absolutely obsessed. I think it all starts with My Little Ponies when we are little.

Who knew that cows can be carniverous? In India, chickens kept disappearing, leading everyone to think that it was neighborhood dogs. When they staked out the coop, they saw a calf gobble up the chickens. That's terrifying.

Kathleen in San Jose is upset with Chris for asking women to call. She says that she works with women all day, and that they are crazy. She does not want to hear them calling into the show. Although she says that I am not that feminine so I am ok. Kathleen also admits that she is one of those women in her thirties, who is still really into horses.

Rob in Santa Clara brings up Cal Worthington ads. I guess he is a dealership owner in Southern California, who always has animals with him named "Spot."

Next, we play the Mr. Appliance ad on this list. Chris points out that he has frosted his hair, because of his tv commercial stardom. This shows up at #44 on the list and is pretty wonderfully awful.

Wow, next up is Empire Carpets at #41. They pull out Darth Vader and the Marx Brothers all in one ad. How did they do that.

Kelly in Oakland wants to take us off topic. She is seeing her weekend supervisor, but also is dating other people. Last night, she was over at his house, having sex, when he dropped the L-word on her. She does not feel the same way, so she did not say that she did. Tonight, he calls her and says he cannot live without her. She has no interest in furthering the relationship at all. But, she has to work with him.

Neither of them are married and she still wants to have sex with him. She just does not want the pressure of his attachment. This guy does, however, seem pretty unstable based on the strength of his statements.

Kelly cannot walk away from this job as she is a single mother. Furthermore, she really loves her job. We all think she should probably not have sex with him anymore. When he begged her to see him tonight she told him to go away. He even showed up at her house and she pretended not to be home.

We wonder whether or not sexual harrassment comes into play. He is her supervisor and is putting her in a situation where she is uncomfortable at work. As Kelly continues to reveal things, she tells us that last night he refused to take her home after they had sex.

Dan in Los Altos thinks she should have never slept with him in the first place. It seems that this guy is unstable and she needs to cut off the relationship. He thinks she should be looking for another job if she can.

9pm: We continue with Kelly's problem this hour. The lines are banging on this, everyone has some advice for her. James in San Jose thinks we are being far too nice to her. She seems to have a pattern of unhealthy relationships. He asks where is her responsibility in this?

Tony in Stockton says run away. He had a friend's mother who was killed by the man in a similar situation. He thinks she should not only quit, but move.

Doug in San Jose thinks that she should end it, but that as of right now it is not sexual harrassment. Furthermore, once she does end it, she should keep a record of everything he does with her. He also thinks that someone from HR should sit with her when having a conversation about this with him. If she waits, he may give her poor performance reviews, which will compromise her credibility when dealing with HR.

Bruce in San Jose works in Human Resources. Basically, he agrees with Doug. He says that often a supervisor is banned from dating subordinates in these companies. This would mean that she would probably be transferred or rescheduled to avoid him.

Lisa in SF says she should just be emotionally distant when dealing with him. Lisa seems like she just gets really cold when she wants to get rid of a guy.

Kelly calls back to tell us that he just called her while we were talking about this. I think she is a little upset by some of the comments of our callers, although agrees with everything we are saying. She does not want to go down the sexual harrassment road. Brad agrees with a caller and tells her she should sit down with him and be honest.

Kelly reveals that she has only known him for two weeks. That changes things a lot and makes this guy a lot creepier. She says the reason for her promiscuity is that her ex refused to experiment in any way.

I have lost patience with Kelly at this point. She is unwilling to change her shift, to tell the manager or to sit down with him and cut it off. She wants to have her cake and eat it too, as the cliche goes. Enough Kelly, you entered into this relationship, it is time to suck it up and do something about it.

Coming back from break, the guys make me happy by playing one of the

Xavier in Napa has had enough as well. He thinks that she has some crazy in her and that we have given her more than enough advice. Elliott in Vallejo thinks so too and says we have been babying her. He says she messed up her job when she started to sleep with her boss.

Tim in Milbrae thinks she should lie, and make him not want her. She should say she has an STD or that he has a small penis. Chris thinks this is flawed because she must have already shown him that she was liking the sex.

We wrap things up with Kelly. She explains further why the sex was so bad in her previous relationship. She says that it was always the same and that she was bored. Once again, Kelly claims that she does not know how to let him down easy. I tell her again that she should just say, "Look, it's been fun, but I just got out of a 14 year relationship and I'm not ready for this. We should just end it now because you are getting too attached." She starts to whine again so we have to say goodbye.

10pm: This leads us to the general discussion of saying "I love you." It is just awful when you say it and it is not said back to you. Chris says that with Ace, she says "I love you" over and over on the phone. He has to say it back or things will be weird.

Brad says when he and T first said it. He said "I know that I love you" when he finally said it. Although neither he or Chris remember who said it first in their relationships, or the day it happened.

The guys found a statistic that 23% of all people in Beverly Hills are Iranian. I guessed Jewish, but that's probably a higher percentage.

Chris feels that he has been incredibly lucky in that all his neighbors in the building are really quiet. There is a fire extinguisher right outside his apartment, where he has kept a lighter. He has kept it there since he moved in, and now it is gone. So now, Chris is convinced that his neighbors are so quiet because they are all thieves. Hmm... think Chris is a little paranoid?

Ok, so we thought that the

Eastern Motors jingle is the song that will most get stuck in your head. But, Brad discovered a song that seems much more invasive. He got this from a European website showing a vignette of a children's show. This song is to explain flies to children. Wow this is really horrifying. I don't want to hear a song about maggot infestation. The hook is "Looking for a place to lay her maggots."

The guys go back to the bad commercials. They point out that mattress places and tire stores always have really bad ads. They talk about how life sucking being at a tire store is. It is interesting for about 10 minutes, which is hell when doing a four hour remote.

Tyler in Moraga has a solution to get songs out of your head. He cannot possibly get to the point and for that is thrown into the Pit of Mediocrity. Thank goodness, I had enough of Tyler.

To wrap up the show, we play a few more of the bad commercials from