Tuesday, March 20th
Hey everyone. Is it just me, or does it not feel like a Tuesday?
7pm: So the guys start off making fun of me and Chris uses the word "jewy." We then go over whether or not that is ok. Chris then asks Dan what the most offensive word would be for the gay community. By annoying Dan, the guys are led to reveal that they were informed that someone important in their lives has "taken umbridge" with them. Now, Dan and I do not know who this is, but think that the phrasing is a little fancy-pants in nature.
Nate in Oakland calls in to ask what exactly is "umbridge?" He also asks Brad for a Penile Euphemism of the Day. He has not imparted us with one of these in quite a while. For tonight, the euphemism is a "belt-lined perpendiculator."
John in Vallejo calls in for advice about a situation he has gotten himself into. He told a female friend that her eyebrows are uneven and that she smells like cat poop. She cried when he said that, and Dan says she only cried because she cannot comeback at him with cutting off sex. I have to interject at that point, saying that maybe she just cried because her feelings were hurt.
Earlier, I said that I had a professor who valued using a smaller, more straightforward vocabulary. Todd calls in to point out that the guys had just used "acerbic" and "ubiquitous." He thought they were both Chris, leading them to ask if people cannot differentiate their voices.
Jeff in Santa Clara says that they sound alike on his radio. He thinks it does not really hurt the show. During this conversation, both Chris and Brad end their statements identifying themselves by saying "their name over."
The calls light up with listeners testifying that they can tell Chris and Brad's voices apart. They point out that Brad's voice is deeper and that Chris always says the phone number. Also, they have very distinct laughs. Frank in Fremont says he could tell because of the different brands of cigarettes they used to smoke.
John in Los Gatos actually is enjoying the "over" thing, saying that it is helpful. I think John is crazy, being that the "over" thing makes me want to jam a fork in my ear.
8pm: As a follow-up to the Hooters discussion, we found an article that Hooters will be opening up in the Holy Land. Brad points out that this may be a sign of the apocalypse, but Chris and I agree that Israel is not the Holy place you would expect.
A 27 year old virgin has posted an ad on the Casual Encounters section of Craigslist looking for someone to deflower her. This is really sad and Chris thinks that she still might not be ready based on her statement, "help me experience the wonders of love." What the hell is she doing on Craigslist?
Brad is wondering what creature this woman is? The circumstances are somewhat bizarre and she must have something a little off about her.
In South Africa, they are giving women a condom-like anti-rape device. It has fishlike teeth that attach to the head and shaft of the penis. The only way the teeth can be removed is by a doctor, in order to prove that an attempt at penetration has occured. The guys point out that the fact that it is on the market is enough of a message. Just the slight chance should be enough to deter even the sickest rapists in the country.
The guys found another virgin on Craigslist, this time it's a 29-year-old guy. His biggest problem has "been with my insecurities with my size." He says, "some women say size matters, so if that is an issue maybe you can teach me how to please you in other ways." Wow. He should hook up with the slighter younger version we spoke of before.
Ok, it is about time for another round of Top Dollar/Bottom Dollar. Brad has always bought really cheap headphones for work, but is thinking about firing on an expensive pair.
Bottom Dollar:
- Caramel Corn - it's all the same
- Lawn Furniture
- Porn (from Scott in Petaluma, but Brad and Chris reprimand him for paying for porn at all)
Top Dollar:
- Hookers
- Lingerie
9pm: Chris is a little upset about something with Ace. He is extremely happy about most things, but she will not give him massages. If any, he will usually get a two-minute massage, because her hands get tired. I ask if at least he will get the occassional backscratch, he says rarely. Brian in El Sobrante is a massage therapist. He says that you do not have to be certified to be a massage therapist, which is somewhat disturbing. For that reason, you should go top dollar to some degree.
Bottom Dollar:
- Dogs (mutts tend to rock)
- Mexican Food (Elisha says gourmet mexican food is crap)
- Chinese Food
- The second or third beer run
- Dentists
- Tattoo "artist"
Top Dollar:
- Vets
- Toilet Paper
- Barbers (Brad had a disappointing experience at SuperCuts)
The Mexican food comment takes us to a tangent about chefs. Wait a minute, The Gray Area went on a tangent??!!! We all agree in a rare circumstance that all chefs are alcoholic psychopaths. As each of us has worked in a restaurant at one point or another, we all have experienced the wrath of an off-kilter chef.
Mark in Palo Alto calls in to say that he does not like the show. He is homeless and has no other entertainment besides the radio. He likes Leykis and hangs on with us, but just does not get it. He says he is homeless but he owns two homes, so I don't understand. And, he is sleeping in a 300ZX. Am I the only one who is lost on this one?
10pm: We continue with Top Dollar/Bottom Dollar. Charles in SF says that you should spend top dollar on a mattress. He also says that you can spend bottom dollar on vodka and just run it a couple times through a filter to make it top dollar.
Steak is worth top dollar sometimes, but may be worth bottom dollar occassionally. TVs is considered top to a degree. Knives are also top, yet Brad's favorite knife was only $20. Continuing with weapons, Brad says that guns and ammo need to be top dollar as well.
Frank in SF brings up top dollar for sushi. It really does make a hell of a difference. And the worst thing in the world is bad sushi.
Bathing suits are top for girls, bottom for guys. Cooking wine, butter and milk are all bottom dollar.
I ask about coffee makers. Chris and a drip and grind by Cuisenart that is expensive that he swears by. He says that if you are into coffee, it makes a difference for some reason and it is really worth the cash.
Howard in SF calls to ask what we think about what has been happening with Internet radio. Basically, the RIAA is going after these online stations for a new fee per song. As some of these stations do not have advertising, they cannot afford these fees.
Chris wonders if they can just change their web address and their IP in order to escape that. Howard contends that these stations would utterly lose their audiences in doing so.
Brad starts talking about the Sims game that his daughter plays. She has started to destroy them by locking them in enclosures keeping them from food and the bathroom. Brad gave her cheat codes that gave her so much money that she can do whatever she wants. Chris wonders why cheat codes do not inhibit the game playing experience before.
Chris brings up a scenario where Brad played T off using Paxy. They went to Costco and he bought a five pound bag of King Crab legs. He forbode his wife from eating this without him. Last night he called his daughter over break and began to question whether his wife was eating any of the King Crab. The reason he is able to do this, is because she hates the crab.
To end the show, the guys read a story entitled "Matadors Chances at Fatherhood Hurt By Goring." The Spanish matador was impaled in the groin by the bull in an upward motion. Wow, I'm not a guy but I can picture how horrifying that must of been. However, good for that bull.
7pm: So the guys start off making fun of me and Chris uses the word "jewy." We then go over whether or not that is ok. Chris then asks Dan what the most offensive word would be for the gay community. By annoying Dan, the guys are led to reveal that they were informed that someone important in their lives has "taken umbridge" with them. Now, Dan and I do not know who this is, but think that the phrasing is a little fancy-pants in nature.
Nate in Oakland calls in to ask what exactly is "umbridge?" He also asks Brad for a Penile Euphemism of the Day. He has not imparted us with one of these in quite a while. For tonight, the euphemism is a "belt-lined perpendiculator."
John in Vallejo calls in for advice about a situation he has gotten himself into. He told a female friend that her eyebrows are uneven and that she smells like cat poop. She cried when he said that, and Dan says she only cried because she cannot comeback at him with cutting off sex. I have to interject at that point, saying that maybe she just cried because her feelings were hurt.
Earlier, I said that I had a professor who valued using a smaller, more straightforward vocabulary. Todd calls in to point out that the guys had just used "acerbic" and "ubiquitous." He thought they were both Chris, leading them to ask if people cannot differentiate their voices.
Jeff in Santa Clara says that they sound alike on his radio. He thinks it does not really hurt the show. During this conversation, both Chris and Brad end their statements identifying themselves by saying "their name over."
The calls light up with listeners testifying that they can tell Chris and Brad's voices apart. They point out that Brad's voice is deeper and that Chris always says the phone number. Also, they have very distinct laughs. Frank in Fremont says he could tell because of the different brands of cigarettes they used to smoke.
John in Los Gatos actually is enjoying the "over" thing, saying that it is helpful. I think John is crazy, being that the "over" thing makes me want to jam a fork in my ear.
8pm: As a follow-up to the Hooters discussion, we found an article that Hooters will be opening up in the Holy Land. Brad points out that this may be a sign of the apocalypse, but Chris and I agree that Israel is not the Holy place you would expect.
A 27 year old virgin has posted an ad on the Casual Encounters section of Craigslist looking for someone to deflower her. This is really sad and Chris thinks that she still might not be ready based on her statement, "help me experience the wonders of love." What the hell is she doing on Craigslist?
Brad is wondering what creature this woman is? The circumstances are somewhat bizarre and she must have something a little off about her.
In South Africa, they are giving women a condom-like anti-rape device. It has fishlike teeth that attach to the head and shaft of the penis. The only way the teeth can be removed is by a doctor, in order to prove that an attempt at penetration has occured. The guys point out that the fact that it is on the market is enough of a message. Just the slight chance should be enough to deter even the sickest rapists in the country.
The guys found another virgin on Craigslist, this time it's a 29-year-old guy. His biggest problem has "been with my insecurities with my size." He says, "some women say size matters, so if that is an issue maybe you can teach me how to please you in other ways." Wow. He should hook up with the slighter younger version we spoke of before.
Ok, it is about time for another round of Top Dollar/Bottom Dollar. Brad has always bought really cheap headphones for work, but is thinking about firing on an expensive pair.
Bottom Dollar:
- Caramel Corn - it's all the same
- Lawn Furniture
- Porn (from Scott in Petaluma, but Brad and Chris reprimand him for paying for porn at all)
Top Dollar:
- Hookers
- Lingerie
9pm: Chris is a little upset about something with Ace. He is extremely happy about most things, but she will not give him massages. If any, he will usually get a two-minute massage, because her hands get tired. I ask if at least he will get the occassional backscratch, he says rarely. Brian in El Sobrante is a massage therapist. He says that you do not have to be certified to be a massage therapist, which is somewhat disturbing. For that reason, you should go top dollar to some degree.
Bottom Dollar:
- Dogs (mutts tend to rock)
- Mexican Food (Elisha says gourmet mexican food is crap)
- Chinese Food
- The second or third beer run
- Dentists
- Tattoo "artist"
Top Dollar:
- Vets
- Toilet Paper
- Barbers (Brad had a disappointing experience at SuperCuts)
The Mexican food comment takes us to a tangent about chefs. Wait a minute, The Gray Area went on a tangent??!!! We all agree in a rare circumstance that all chefs are alcoholic psychopaths. As each of us has worked in a restaurant at one point or another, we all have experienced the wrath of an off-kilter chef.
Mark in Palo Alto calls in to say that he does not like the show. He is homeless and has no other entertainment besides the radio. He likes Leykis and hangs on with us, but just does not get it. He says he is homeless but he owns two homes, so I don't understand. And, he is sleeping in a 300ZX. Am I the only one who is lost on this one?
10pm: We continue with Top Dollar/Bottom Dollar. Charles in SF says that you should spend top dollar on a mattress. He also says that you can spend bottom dollar on vodka and just run it a couple times through a filter to make it top dollar.
Steak is worth top dollar sometimes, but may be worth bottom dollar occassionally. TVs is considered top to a degree. Knives are also top, yet Brad's favorite knife was only $20. Continuing with weapons, Brad says that guns and ammo need to be top dollar as well.
Frank in SF brings up top dollar for sushi. It really does make a hell of a difference. And the worst thing in the world is bad sushi.
Bathing suits are top for girls, bottom for guys. Cooking wine, butter and milk are all bottom dollar.
I ask about coffee makers. Chris and a drip and grind by Cuisenart that is expensive that he swears by. He says that if you are into coffee, it makes a difference for some reason and it is really worth the cash.
Howard in SF calls to ask what we think about what has been happening with Internet radio. Basically, the RIAA is going after these online stations for a new fee per song. As some of these stations do not have advertising, they cannot afford these fees.
Chris wonders if they can just change their web address and their IP in order to escape that. Howard contends that these stations would utterly lose their audiences in doing so.
Brad starts talking about the Sims game that his daughter plays. She has started to destroy them by locking them in enclosures keeping them from food and the bathroom. Brad gave her cheat codes that gave her so much money that she can do whatever she wants. Chris wonders why cheat codes do not inhibit the game playing experience before.
Chris brings up a scenario where Brad played T off using Paxy. They went to Costco and he bought a five pound bag of King Crab legs. He forbode his wife from eating this without him. Last night he called his daughter over break and began to question whether his wife was eating any of the King Crab. The reason he is able to do this, is because she hates the crab.
To end the show, the guys read a story entitled "Matadors Chances at Fatherhood Hurt By Goring." The Spanish matador was impaled in the groin by the bull in an upward motion. Wow, I'm not a guy but I can picture how horrifying that must of been. However, good for that bull.
posted by The Gray Area at 7:00 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home