Wednesday, January 10th

Hey everyone. So, I just found out that it is a huge pain in the ass to leave comments. But, I just changed the settings, so now it should be much easier. So, leave some damn comments.

7pm: The guys start off with "The Munsters" theme, to honor the death of Lily Munster, Yvonne De Carlo. They realize that she was tv's first co-dependent.

If you missed it last night, the tone was set inadvertantly about Prince Albert piercings. Chris asks Brad today if you really even want your penis stared at. Both agree that they do not really feel that is necessary. Brad says it is weird when you have been with a woman long enough, that she knows your "unit" better than you do. Chris says that to this day, he is still the best he has ever had. Ahh, starting off classy today.

For some reason, these pamphets for PETA were left in the air studio, when Chris and Brad came in today? They are promoting a vegan lifestyle, and invoke guilt about the treatment of chickens. Chris says that poultry does not care about us, so he does not care. He thinks that if these chickens are being treated so poorly, then we should just set them free, and see what happens.

The phones really light up on this issue. Dan gets pretty heated at some of the callers, and defends the vegetarian lifestyle. Most of the callers have a problem with the aggressive nature of PETA and other animal rights groups. As the conversation continues, we also get several calls from the vegetarian side of things. These callers are not the militant hippies, that stereotypically, most think of, but reasonable people who just want to defend their lifestyle.

I used to be a vegetarian, but I have always had a problem with people pushing their beliefs on others. If you make that choice, it is not your place to force that choice on others. I get very tired of hearing that I am immoral, because I went back to meat. I was unhealthy as a vegetarian, and an omnivore lifestyle is best for me.

8pm: At the end of the hour, we were talking about ants. Chris was asking a caller whether he had respect for ants. This brings back a traumatic childhood memory of mine. When I was about three, I remember that I walked into my parents' laundry room. To my utter horror, the entire room was covered in ants, covered!!! I still shutter just thinking about it.

Martin in Marin calls in to tell us about a meal he had in Hong Kong, drunken prawns. They bring out live prawns in a bowl, and poor vodka in. The prawns get completely drunk swimming in the vodka, and then they throw them in boiling water to steam them. That actually sounds almost kinder, because at least they are drunk when boiled alive.

The guys bring up that they did learn from the PETA pamphlet that Kosher meat, is the only meat not stunned. They ask me about it, as though I keep Kosher. Of course I don't keep Kosher, I have not been to synagogue in over five years.

Julia in Sonoma calls in to let us know, that as a chef, carnivorous animals are not good for consumption. That makes sense, predators would probably not taste nearly as good as prey.

9pm: We go over our liking of the 7-9 listener versus the 9-11 listener. Chris seems to be playing both sides of the table. Brian in San Jose points out that the 7-11 listeners are still lucid, and not liquored up yet.

So, a study just came out that 13% of San Franciscans are drug users as opposed to the 8% national average. Well, the pot out here is much better than in Pennsylvania, so I am not surprised.

In talking about beef, Brad's greatest fear, mad cow disease comes up. He is really concerned about this, yet would never stop eating meat. Tony in San Rafael lived in England when that came out. He says that he could not eat hamburgers for years in fear of the disease. He also recommends the House of Prime Rib. Chris says that he cannot get on board with any restaurant that is the "house of" anything.

The guys mention that there is a chance that they might get motorcycles from Arlen Ness. I cannot imagine either of these having bikes without killing themselves. Hmm, this could present an interesting opportunity for me.

Listener Alex emails and suggests that we go to a website. I won't say what it is, if you heard I am sorry for you. Holy crap, that is the most revolting thing I have ever seen. Seriously, do not go to it. I'm not kidding, I almost threw up. I hate you Alex in Vallejo, that really was not cool.

The guys wrap up the hour, talking how much play the keyboard player gets. He always has to wait in line behind all the other guys in the band.

10pm: The guys ask a profound question this hour, do you really want your ex to be happy?

Jemma from Vallejo calls up to say that she wants her ex to be happy, but just not with her.

Church from Richmond thinks that it all depends on how things went down. He says that if you are in a new relationship, then you probably do want the other person to be happy.

Nicole in Oakland is pretty honest. She says that if you got your heart broken, you want the other person to suffer that same pain.

Chris talks about his situation with exes. He says that one thing that made it easier for him to feel that way, is that she had been dealt a pretty terrible situation in life.

So, little listener Bill, called in with a theme song for us. It was, um, interesting. I think it took him about 30 seconds to write it. Dan suggests that it be sung to the tune of The Farmer in the Dell. This of course, sentences all of us to having that stuck in our heads for the rest of the week. Dan prints out the lyrics for all of us. And this is what bothers me... "The nurse takes a cow." What sick thing does that imply?

Brad had a pretty rough divorce in his first marriage. She left him out of the blue and he was pretty hurt by the whole thing. He would like to say that he would like her to be happy, but honestly, wants her to rue her decision. She married someone else, only six months after she left him, and he treated her like crap. Brad admits that this gave him a great deal of glee.

I ask Brad if it is easier to feel happy for an ex, after they have been hurt themselves. The karma has cashed in, so is it easier to not wish pain upon them anymore.

Thinking about this more, Chris does not wish his second ex pain, but wishes her a tiny pebble in her shoe, always to annoy her. His third ex, he was with for nine years, but realizes that they never should have been together. His most recent ex, he wishes her the happiness, that only a really hard lesson can bring.

Chris reads a death threat written by a nut to Hawaii Five-O star, Jack Lord. The thing with this letter, is that it is very poorly written. It is actually pretty hilarious. Chris is convinced that he can write a much better death threat than this nutjob.

First of all, do not handwrite the letter, it makes you look crazy and sloppy. Furthermore, make the letter sound rational, almost official. This gives said letter more creedence. Also, it includes suggestions to make the process easier for all.

If you would like to purchase the actual template written by Chris, please contact The Gray Area. All orders are available through check, money order or COD.

The Gray Area and CBS Radio in no way endorse the use of death threats . The letter previously mentioned and read on the show, is of course, for entertainment purposes only. If you feel the need to create a death threat letter, please immediately report to your local nuthouse. If you believe that this is for real, please immediately purchase a helmet at your local sporting goods outlet, because you may be the most gullible individual in existence.