Monday, January 22nd
Hey everyone. Today should be a little weird, because Chris is stuck in Fresno. So, Brad is here and Chris is in a studio down there. But, we will pull through, don't worry.
7pm: Chris starts by complaining that the studio there is about 100 degrees. Then Brad asks him what he is wearing. That's a little weird. Brad is also in a weird position, because unlike most days, he is in a position where he can face Dan and I.
Ok, so in the pristine car that Brad just got, he apparently left bait in the trunk all weekend. He had it in the car, and got a little frisky with his wife, and forgot all about it.
Haley in Benecia calls to tell us the meaning of medium-retarded. The highest level of retardation is 50-70. She says that Chris and Brad being semi-retarded leaves them at about 30. Wow.
Rick in SF says that he knows how they get rid of the smell in Brad's trunk. Apparently, you just put a bowl of cider vinegar in the trunk for a while, and let it sit. It will smell like vinegar, but that's a lot better than bait.
Mott in Oakland suggests drier sheets for the smell, because Brad is so likely to forget that the vinegar is there.
Tommy in Petaluma has been in a similar situation. He left some squid trimmings in his car, got drunk and left them there overnight. It even got into the padding under the carpet. His solution is to leave the windows open for about four months. That's great unless you want the car stolen.
Finally, Randy in Walnut Creek used to run a detail shop. He wants to know if there is any liquid from the bait in the trunk. He says to use some cleaner and a wet/dry vac and then just throw some air freshener with enzymes in there, and that will absorb the smell.
So, this leads us to the question, what is the worst thing you have left in your car?
- Mark in SF tells us about how he was unable to get dog smell out of the car he bought. The solution was Nature's Miracle, from a pet store.
- Paul in Hayward says he found 3 month old Chinese food in his trunk. Eww. He had left it in there before he went out of the country for that time period.
- Bill in Pleasanton really messed up by spilling bong water in his dad's brand new car. That is such a terrible and distinct smell. He got beat down pretty bad for that one.
8pm: We continue with the smelly car stories. What listeners found this hour:
- Chris in Napa worked at a truck stop and came across an abandoned big rig full of rotten frozen chickens.
- Kyle in Lincoln has one of the craziest stories. He went out and shot a rabbit in a neighborhood, to see what it tastes like. When they were driving down the road, the rabbit came alive and they started beating it with a screwdriver, leaving rabbit blood all over the car. Ewww. This is horrible.
- Mike in Mendocino had a old bottle of strawberry milk left in his car when they went camping. His stupid friend took a big swig of it, and immediately threw up all over the place.
- Tony in Fairfield got revenge on a customer by putting nasty fish juice in a guy's truck. The thing is, he put it in the wrong truck.
- Craig in San Jose used a beer can as a urinal in his car. He gets pulled over, the cop asks to see the can, and takes a whiff. Immediately he starts throwing up all over the side of the car. He got taken downtown for that one.
- Jason in Napa had concentrated fox urine with him as a scent cover for hunting. This stuff is supposedly incredibly strong. He ended up spilling it all over his car, because his friend opened it while the car was moving.
- Jay in Napa used to chew tobacco, and had a spit cup in his car. It was in the back, and his dog got into the car. Of course, the dog spilled it all over everything and the dog got really sick from it.
9pm: So, Chris and I have to communicate over Instant Messenger today, through Gmail. What we forget is that Brad can read everything we write, because he is also signed into the account. I was showing Chris the emoticons, and he got really tripped out because, "they MOVE!!" Brad does not see that they move, and just thinks that conversation is incredibly bizarre and creepy.
Steven in Oakland wraps us up by telling us his chew story. He was driving down the freeway with his cup in his car, and he hit a bump. The chew splashed all over his face and chest, and his friend threw up in response. To this, Steven threw up as well. It was so disgusting, that he had to sell the car, because he could not get rid of the overwhelming stench.
So, Chris thinks of a contest. He has noticed in apartment hunting, that the complexes have absurd names. The further from the trees, the more tree-oriented the name is. So, what is the most ridiculous apartment complex name?
- Andy in Sonoma says there is a trailer park for older people called "Journey's End." That is horrifyingly honest.
- Tom in Alameda tells us about "Aloha Gardens" in Hayward, surrounded by warehouses and gravel.
- Patrick in Santa Rosa has "Whiteskate," located in the black neighborhood in Santa Rosa.
- Chris in Oakland points out Mountain House, a new city that is not near mountains at all.
- Dennis in Alameda lives in a 4 story building called The Towers.
- Luke in SF calls about a complex called "Cherry Orchard" that actually destroyed cherry orchards in its construction. That's just awful.
- Joel in Boulder Creek tells us about crappy apartments in Mountain View called "Versailles."
- Aaron in San Anselmo says he is next to "Robin Hood Manor" full of mean people and "Whisper Ridge" full of loud people.
- Vanessa in San Jose says "The Woods" apartment complex in the middle of Fremont, where there are no trees in sight.
- Pat in Livermore mentions a trailer park in North Carolina named "Cedar Creek Resorts."
- Mike in SF says "Eagles Landing" in the Mission.
10pm: Last hour, a caller was talking about the Rossmoor retirement village in Walnut Creek. He claims that there is actually a casket outlet in the community. James in American Canyon confirms this and expands on how weird it is. It is like old people Epcot Center with a speed limit of 25 mph throughout. There are no children allowed for more than 5 days at a time. I think the guys are going to have to go down there with a minidisk.
Andrew from Concord drove down to the Rossmoor village to see if there is a casket store in there. He asks the gate workers and they say that there is no such store there. Because Andrew goes so above the call of duty, he gets a four pack of tickets to the A's FanFest on Saturday. Thanks Andrew.
Eric in San Jose tells us there is a casket outlet store in Santa Clara, of course, right next to a cemetery. What a terrible thing to advertise.
This ridiculous kid has been calling pretty consistently lately. He called first tonight pretending to be Sharice. After I shot him down, he calls as himself, claiming that was not him. After this, he calls two more times. Man, I am so glad I am not 14 anymore, with nothing else to do but call, and not get on a radio show.
Chris has been asking about rental car damage stories. Mark in Livermore calls to tell us about a Dodge Dakota that they took to Pismo Beach. They must have had the insurance, because they went dune running with the car. This includes rolling it on its side in the sand. Doing all of this, popped the tires right off the rim. The insurance covered each and every penny of the damage.
Mike in Morgan Hill got a Dodge Neon when he was trapped because of a cancelled flight. His solution is to do some doughnuts in his client's parking lot. Of course, all of the cops in the town are in that parking lot taking their break. He was saved by a carload of punk kids doing a brake stand right next to him.
And with that, we are done for the night. I apologize to my mother and have a good night.
7pm: Chris starts by complaining that the studio there is about 100 degrees. Then Brad asks him what he is wearing. That's a little weird. Brad is also in a weird position, because unlike most days, he is in a position where he can face Dan and I.
Ok, so in the pristine car that Brad just got, he apparently left bait in the trunk all weekend. He had it in the car, and got a little frisky with his wife, and forgot all about it.
Haley in Benecia calls to tell us the meaning of medium-retarded. The highest level of retardation is 50-70. She says that Chris and Brad being semi-retarded leaves them at about 30. Wow.
Rick in SF says that he knows how they get rid of the smell in Brad's trunk. Apparently, you just put a bowl of cider vinegar in the trunk for a while, and let it sit. It will smell like vinegar, but that's a lot better than bait.
Mott in Oakland suggests drier sheets for the smell, because Brad is so likely to forget that the vinegar is there.
Tommy in Petaluma has been in a similar situation. He left some squid trimmings in his car, got drunk and left them there overnight. It even got into the padding under the carpet. His solution is to leave the windows open for about four months. That's great unless you want the car stolen.
Finally, Randy in Walnut Creek used to run a detail shop. He wants to know if there is any liquid from the bait in the trunk. He says to use some cleaner and a wet/dry vac and then just throw some air freshener with enzymes in there, and that will absorb the smell.
So, this leads us to the question, what is the worst thing you have left in your car?
- Mark in SF tells us about how he was unable to get dog smell out of the car he bought. The solution was Nature's Miracle, from a pet store.
- Paul in Hayward says he found 3 month old Chinese food in his trunk. Eww. He had left it in there before he went out of the country for that time period.
- Bill in Pleasanton really messed up by spilling bong water in his dad's brand new car. That is such a terrible and distinct smell. He got beat down pretty bad for that one.
8pm: We continue with the smelly car stories. What listeners found this hour:
- Chris in Napa worked at a truck stop and came across an abandoned big rig full of rotten frozen chickens.
- Kyle in Lincoln has one of the craziest stories. He went out and shot a rabbit in a neighborhood, to see what it tastes like. When they were driving down the road, the rabbit came alive and they started beating it with a screwdriver, leaving rabbit blood all over the car. Ewww. This is horrible.
- Mike in Mendocino had a old bottle of strawberry milk left in his car when they went camping. His stupid friend took a big swig of it, and immediately threw up all over the place.
- Tony in Fairfield got revenge on a customer by putting nasty fish juice in a guy's truck. The thing is, he put it in the wrong truck.
- Craig in San Jose used a beer can as a urinal in his car. He gets pulled over, the cop asks to see the can, and takes a whiff. Immediately he starts throwing up all over the side of the car. He got taken downtown for that one.
- Jason in Napa had concentrated fox urine with him as a scent cover for hunting. This stuff is supposedly incredibly strong. He ended up spilling it all over his car, because his friend opened it while the car was moving.
- Jay in Napa used to chew tobacco, and had a spit cup in his car. It was in the back, and his dog got into the car. Of course, the dog spilled it all over everything and the dog got really sick from it.
9pm: So, Chris and I have to communicate over Instant Messenger today, through Gmail. What we forget is that Brad can read everything we write, because he is also signed into the account. I was showing Chris the emoticons, and he got really tripped out because, "they MOVE!!" Brad does not see that they move, and just thinks that conversation is incredibly bizarre and creepy.
Steven in Oakland wraps us up by telling us his chew story. He was driving down the freeway with his cup in his car, and he hit a bump. The chew splashed all over his face and chest, and his friend threw up in response. To this, Steven threw up as well. It was so disgusting, that he had to sell the car, because he could not get rid of the overwhelming stench.
So, Chris thinks of a contest. He has noticed in apartment hunting, that the complexes have absurd names. The further from the trees, the more tree-oriented the name is. So, what is the most ridiculous apartment complex name?
- Andy in Sonoma says there is a trailer park for older people called "Journey's End." That is horrifyingly honest.
- Tom in Alameda tells us about "Aloha Gardens" in Hayward, surrounded by warehouses and gravel.
- Patrick in Santa Rosa has "Whiteskate," located in the black neighborhood in Santa Rosa.
- Chris in Oakland points out Mountain House, a new city that is not near mountains at all.
- Dennis in Alameda lives in a 4 story building called The Towers.
- Luke in SF calls about a complex called "Cherry Orchard" that actually destroyed cherry orchards in its construction. That's just awful.
- Joel in Boulder Creek tells us about crappy apartments in Mountain View called "Versailles."
- Aaron in San Anselmo says he is next to "Robin Hood Manor" full of mean people and "Whisper Ridge" full of loud people.
- Vanessa in San Jose says "The Woods" apartment complex in the middle of Fremont, where there are no trees in sight.
- Pat in Livermore mentions a trailer park in North Carolina named "Cedar Creek Resorts."
- Mike in SF says "Eagles Landing" in the Mission.
10pm: Last hour, a caller was talking about the Rossmoor retirement village in Walnut Creek. He claims that there is actually a casket outlet in the community. James in American Canyon confirms this and expands on how weird it is. It is like old people Epcot Center with a speed limit of 25 mph throughout. There are no children allowed for more than 5 days at a time. I think the guys are going to have to go down there with a minidisk.
Andrew from Concord drove down to the Rossmoor village to see if there is a casket store in there. He asks the gate workers and they say that there is no such store there. Because Andrew goes so above the call of duty, he gets a four pack of tickets to the A's FanFest on Saturday. Thanks Andrew.
Eric in San Jose tells us there is a casket outlet store in Santa Clara, of course, right next to a cemetery. What a terrible thing to advertise.
This ridiculous kid has been calling pretty consistently lately. He called first tonight pretending to be Sharice. After I shot him down, he calls as himself, claiming that was not him. After this, he calls two more times. Man, I am so glad I am not 14 anymore, with nothing else to do but call, and not get on a radio show.
Chris has been asking about rental car damage stories. Mark in Livermore calls to tell us about a Dodge Dakota that they took to Pismo Beach. They must have had the insurance, because they went dune running with the car. This includes rolling it on its side in the sand. Doing all of this, popped the tires right off the rim. The insurance covered each and every penny of the damage.
Mike in Morgan Hill got a Dodge Neon when he was trapped because of a cancelled flight. His solution is to do some doughnuts in his client's parking lot. Of course, all of the cops in the town are in that parking lot taking their break. He was saved by a carload of punk kids doing a brake stand right next to him.
And with that, we are done for the night. I apologize to my mother and have a good night.
posted by The Gray Area at 7:01 PM
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