Tuesday, February 13th
Hey everyone. Well, since tomorrow is Valentine's Day, the show will be largely holiday related tonight.
7pm: The guys banter about and then get into the topic, When Valentine's Day Becomes Inappropriate. Here is the first example: When you are at the office, and your desk is covered with Valentines from your creepy co-worker. You go through the balloons, the candy, the telegram, and then you get to the card. Oh no, it's from the smelly guy in accounting. AHHHHH.
Brad points out that the secret admirer is never the person that you like. Chris realizes that the only solution for this, is for one of you to quit. Yeah, he's probably right, nothing is worse than that level of awkwardness around the office.
Mary in San Jose has had this happen to her. She was living with someone at the time, went into work, and received a call from shipping. Apparently, they had a huge bouquet for her from someone she had met only one time, but who worked in the company. Of course, he calls to see if she had received it. Of course there is that long, awkward pause, because you don't want to be mean, but you don't want the attention. Her solution was to leave them at the office and never say a word.
When Brad and T were first dating, she was very popular with her customers at the bar. Because she is such a friendly person, a lot of guys thought she was interested in them. On Valentine's Day, a guy left roses on her doorstep at home. Then at work the next day, he had left roses there, as well. Brad demanded that T tell him that Brad would kill him if he did not cease this pursuit.
The guys point out that you have to give out Valentines to everyone now. I used to get Valentine's Day candy from my parents. I never thought there was something wrong with that.
Ugh, the guys mention the telegrams. Oh no, please don't ever send that to anyone. That is just revolting. Paul in Oakland points out the oversized Valentine's cards they sell at convenience stores.
Oh no, I sent the guys a website that allows you to create personalized Valentine's songs. Of course, I'm an idiot, and did not realize that this would be used against me. Ugh, that was the most schmalzy terrible thing ever. I will be contacting HR shortly.
8pm: We all wonder, where is the guy and the keyboard that you only hear in these awful romantic songs?
Oh no, the guys found a website where you can send people some sort of gram. Of course, there is an option for the clown. So now, they really want to send a clown to follow me around all day. No, anything but that. If somehow you do not know, I am absolutely creeped out to the core by clowns.
Great, now they are making a prank song for me on this stupid website, Instasong.com. They even find an option for the habit of "mooching smokes." This just sounds like this will be completely lame. And, after hearing it for about 10 seconds, we turn it off, because it is so terrible.
This show gets more and more disturbing every moment. Matt in San Jose wants to avenge me from their torture. He is going to send them so man-panties. After Chris and Brad ask if they are edible, he calls to ask if they want "Buffalo or Elk?" Wow. This is really weird.
The guys bitch about the rose-toting women roaming around restaurants. They come up to the table, and give you no option but to buy a flower. If you don't, you look like an a-hole to your woman.
Dan presents his idea for a change in Valentine's Day. He thinks that this day should be a day where no matter what relationship you are in, you get to sleep with whomever you want. And on the 15th, you have to return home to your partner. Chris points out that this will just be a day of rejection for most straight men.
Brad says that the best present for any woman to give her man, is to do the sexual thing you will not usually do on that night. Chris laughs at this, saying that women do nothing on Valentine's Day.
Throughout the show, we have been checking the Casual Encounters section of Craigslist. Of course, Brad made the mistake of clicking on an ad that has a picture. Everyone knows that you must proceed with caution when ads have pictures. Dan says that Brad is awfully sensitive for a tall man. That is f-ing hilarious.
The guys talk about the peril of the mix tape. Particularly, the need to fill the whole tape. Chris has several times ruined the tape, because he adds a song that ends up offensive to the girl in question.
Brad admits that you are never as much of a pussy, as when you have picked out all the music, and you are deciding the order. This is especially true of the breakup mixtape. The one that you make to portray the heartbreak you are enduring. Of course, in their generation, you end the tape with "Love Bites."
Oh no, Dion in San Jose tells us that he made a much worse mistake than the mix tape. After a break up, on a rainy day at lunchtime, there was kareoke. His ex was sitting in the front row and he got up and sang "All Out of Love" by Air Supply. The worst part, she got up in the middle and walked out. That is just horrifying. I don't understand how his friends allowed him to do this. After this, he did finish the song, slowly put down the mic, and sulked off the stage.
9pm: Matt from SF says that "Desperado" should be the last song on the mix tape, as opposed to "Love Bites." He says that he has made about six. He also confirms that the girls share the songs, as he became known as "Desperado" at summer camp. Aww, poor Matt.
Brady in San Rafael made a one song tape for his high school girlfriend. He recorded "I Finally Found the Love of a Lifetime" and gave it to her. That same night, she broke up with him. Then he wrote down the lyrics to another sappy song and placed it under the windshield wipers of her car. He was watching from afar when she found it, and watched her show it to all her friends and laugh at his pain.
Pamela in Sonoma broke up with her high school boyfriend. She went out with her friends and came home to find a coffee soaked version of a Duran Duran song in a bottle. There were also about six versions of the song on a tape. Of course, she showed this to all her friends, and they mocked it relentlessly all night.
Jason in San Leandro would play the song "Kim" by Eminem in the car while he and his wife were divorcing. If you don't know this song, it is really graphic and violent. This is the way that he conveyed the message that he wanted the divorce in the first place. That is really rageful.
Chris remembers some traumatizing moments of his childhood. Of course, Mom would get the big box of little valentines for the whole class. She would demand that you give these to all the kids in your class, no matter what their social status. You even have to get them for the bullies, who are torturing you after school.
Brad tells about when he went to high school, they had a deal where you could send roses to your classmates. There were white, pink, and red depending on the message you want to send to the recipient. Senior year, Brad got different colored flowers throughout the day from a secret admirer. As the day goes on, it increases more and more. He is nervous, because he realizes that it is probably not a girl he likes. Finally, he realizes that it is from a little freshman that he has no interest in at all. The friends come up to him, and he tells them that he does not like her, therefore making him a dick.
10pm: Alan in Pinole had something much worse in his high school. They would not only get a rose, but you would be sung to in front of the entire class. Then, they would pin a heart to your shirt with the girl's name. That is terrible.
Chris plays a little bit of piano and wrote a song to a girl. He dragged her over to the music room. He started to sing and had the dreadful feeling in his heart during the song. Despite all the preparation, he realized that he just wants it to be over.
For Jenna in San Pablo, she had enough of this in high school. She and her friends decided their freshman year to buy all the roses that were to be distributed. When Valentine's Day came around, they got the roses and threw them out. Everyone was pretty happy, except of course, for the cheerleaders.
The guys play some excerpts from a video dating service in the 1980's. Oh, these guys sound so incredibly sad. Sooooo sad. My favorite line is "I just want a woman who can get down and bowl." Also, "A lot I'll just stay up late at night and watch you sleep." That is really, really creepy.
The guys bring up, what happens when you have just started dating someone when Valentine's Day comes around? You have just been dating for a few weeks, so what do you do? I say you do something small, to let her know you like her, but not scare her off.
Kevin in SF met a girl a few weeks ago in his school, and they have classes together. He is planning to woo her tomorrow at school. He has decided to leave her gifts in each class, and then ask her out at the end of the day. I really hope that she is going to say yes, and not be scared off by his effort. He wants to plan a whole afternoon and dinner for them. Chris and Brad advise that maybe these plans are too strong. I agree, you do not want to scare the girl off.
Brian in Novato had a similar situation when he was in high school. They ended up going out, and it was incredibly awkward, because she was overwhelmed by the attention. He warns that if it does not work, Kevin may have to deal with a lot of embarrassment.
Personally, I think that it is tough to be a nice guy when you are seventeen. Girls have not been burned yet, and generally don't want the guy that comes on too strong. Beware Kevin, watch your money.
Happy Valentine's Day. I apologize to my mother, have a good night.
7pm: The guys banter about and then get into the topic, When Valentine's Day Becomes Inappropriate. Here is the first example: When you are at the office, and your desk is covered with Valentines from your creepy co-worker. You go through the balloons, the candy, the telegram, and then you get to the card. Oh no, it's from the smelly guy in accounting. AHHHHH.
Brad points out that the secret admirer is never the person that you like. Chris realizes that the only solution for this, is for one of you to quit. Yeah, he's probably right, nothing is worse than that level of awkwardness around the office.
Mary in San Jose has had this happen to her. She was living with someone at the time, went into work, and received a call from shipping. Apparently, they had a huge bouquet for her from someone she had met only one time, but who worked in the company. Of course, he calls to see if she had received it. Of course there is that long, awkward pause, because you don't want to be mean, but you don't want the attention. Her solution was to leave them at the office and never say a word.
When Brad and T were first dating, she was very popular with her customers at the bar. Because she is such a friendly person, a lot of guys thought she was interested in them. On Valentine's Day, a guy left roses on her doorstep at home. Then at work the next day, he had left roses there, as well. Brad demanded that T tell him that Brad would kill him if he did not cease this pursuit.
The guys point out that you have to give out Valentines to everyone now. I used to get Valentine's Day candy from my parents. I never thought there was something wrong with that.
Ugh, the guys mention the telegrams. Oh no, please don't ever send that to anyone. That is just revolting. Paul in Oakland points out the oversized Valentine's cards they sell at convenience stores.
Oh no, I sent the guys a website that allows you to create personalized Valentine's songs. Of course, I'm an idiot, and did not realize that this would be used against me. Ugh, that was the most schmalzy terrible thing ever. I will be contacting HR shortly.
8pm: We all wonder, where is the guy and the keyboard that you only hear in these awful romantic songs?
Oh no, the guys found a website where you can send people some sort of gram. Of course, there is an option for the clown. So now, they really want to send a clown to follow me around all day. No, anything but that. If somehow you do not know, I am absolutely creeped out to the core by clowns.
Great, now they are making a prank song for me on this stupid website, Instasong.com. They even find an option for the habit of "mooching smokes." This just sounds like this will be completely lame. And, after hearing it for about 10 seconds, we turn it off, because it is so terrible.
This show gets more and more disturbing every moment. Matt in San Jose wants to avenge me from their torture. He is going to send them so man-panties. After Chris and Brad ask if they are edible, he calls to ask if they want "Buffalo or Elk?" Wow. This is really weird.
The guys bitch about the rose-toting women roaming around restaurants. They come up to the table, and give you no option but to buy a flower. If you don't, you look like an a-hole to your woman.
Dan presents his idea for a change in Valentine's Day. He thinks that this day should be a day where no matter what relationship you are in, you get to sleep with whomever you want. And on the 15th, you have to return home to your partner. Chris points out that this will just be a day of rejection for most straight men.
Brad says that the best present for any woman to give her man, is to do the sexual thing you will not usually do on that night. Chris laughs at this, saying that women do nothing on Valentine's Day.
Throughout the show, we have been checking the Casual Encounters section of Craigslist. Of course, Brad made the mistake of clicking on an ad that has a picture. Everyone knows that you must proceed with caution when ads have pictures. Dan says that Brad is awfully sensitive for a tall man. That is f-ing hilarious.
The guys talk about the peril of the mix tape. Particularly, the need to fill the whole tape. Chris has several times ruined the tape, because he adds a song that ends up offensive to the girl in question.
Brad admits that you are never as much of a pussy, as when you have picked out all the music, and you are deciding the order. This is especially true of the breakup mixtape. The one that you make to portray the heartbreak you are enduring. Of course, in their generation, you end the tape with "Love Bites."
Oh no, Dion in San Jose tells us that he made a much worse mistake than the mix tape. After a break up, on a rainy day at lunchtime, there was kareoke. His ex was sitting in the front row and he got up and sang "All Out of Love" by Air Supply. The worst part, she got up in the middle and walked out. That is just horrifying. I don't understand how his friends allowed him to do this. After this, he did finish the song, slowly put down the mic, and sulked off the stage.
9pm: Matt from SF says that "Desperado" should be the last song on the mix tape, as opposed to "Love Bites." He says that he has made about six. He also confirms that the girls share the songs, as he became known as "Desperado" at summer camp. Aww, poor Matt.
Brady in San Rafael made a one song tape for his high school girlfriend. He recorded "I Finally Found the Love of a Lifetime" and gave it to her. That same night, she broke up with him. Then he wrote down the lyrics to another sappy song and placed it under the windshield wipers of her car. He was watching from afar when she found it, and watched her show it to all her friends and laugh at his pain.
Pamela in Sonoma broke up with her high school boyfriend. She went out with her friends and came home to find a coffee soaked version of a Duran Duran song in a bottle. There were also about six versions of the song on a tape. Of course, she showed this to all her friends, and they mocked it relentlessly all night.
Jason in San Leandro would play the song "Kim" by Eminem in the car while he and his wife were divorcing. If you don't know this song, it is really graphic and violent. This is the way that he conveyed the message that he wanted the divorce in the first place. That is really rageful.
Chris remembers some traumatizing moments of his childhood. Of course, Mom would get the big box of little valentines for the whole class. She would demand that you give these to all the kids in your class, no matter what their social status. You even have to get them for the bullies, who are torturing you after school.
Brad tells about when he went to high school, they had a deal where you could send roses to your classmates. There were white, pink, and red depending on the message you want to send to the recipient. Senior year, Brad got different colored flowers throughout the day from a secret admirer. As the day goes on, it increases more and more. He is nervous, because he realizes that it is probably not a girl he likes. Finally, he realizes that it is from a little freshman that he has no interest in at all. The friends come up to him, and he tells them that he does not like her, therefore making him a dick.
10pm: Alan in Pinole had something much worse in his high school. They would not only get a rose, but you would be sung to in front of the entire class. Then, they would pin a heart to your shirt with the girl's name. That is terrible.
Chris plays a little bit of piano and wrote a song to a girl. He dragged her over to the music room. He started to sing and had the dreadful feeling in his heart during the song. Despite all the preparation, he realized that he just wants it to be over.
For Jenna in San Pablo, she had enough of this in high school. She and her friends decided their freshman year to buy all the roses that were to be distributed. When Valentine's Day came around, they got the roses and threw them out. Everyone was pretty happy, except of course, for the cheerleaders.
The guys play some excerpts from a video dating service in the 1980's. Oh, these guys sound so incredibly sad. Sooooo sad. My favorite line is "I just want a woman who can get down and bowl." Also, "A lot I'll just stay up late at night and watch you sleep." That is really, really creepy.
The guys bring up, what happens when you have just started dating someone when Valentine's Day comes around? You have just been dating for a few weeks, so what do you do? I say you do something small, to let her know you like her, but not scare her off.
Kevin in SF met a girl a few weeks ago in his school, and they have classes together. He is planning to woo her tomorrow at school. He has decided to leave her gifts in each class, and then ask her out at the end of the day. I really hope that she is going to say yes, and not be scared off by his effort. He wants to plan a whole afternoon and dinner for them. Chris and Brad advise that maybe these plans are too strong. I agree, you do not want to scare the girl off.
Brian in Novato had a similar situation when he was in high school. They ended up going out, and it was incredibly awkward, because she was overwhelmed by the attention. He warns that if it does not work, Kevin may have to deal with a lot of embarrassment.
Personally, I think that it is tough to be a nice guy when you are seventeen. Girls have not been burned yet, and generally don't want the guy that comes on too strong. Beware Kevin, watch your money.
Happy Valentine's Day. I apologize to my mother, have a good night.
posted by The Gray Area at 7:04 PM
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