Wednesday, December 13

Hey everyone, hope your day is going ok, despite all this disgusting weather.

7pm: The guys start off talking about backdoor bleaching. On a list of celebrity rumors we went over yesterday, Courtney Cox had been accused of this. None of us really know what is involved in this. So, tonight, we will hopefully be speaking to Cindy Esser Thorin from Pink Cheeks Salon in Sherman Oaks. She can shed some "light" on the situation.

I had to call and ask salon managers to come on the show and talk to us. And I have to say, these phone conversations were incredibly uncomfortable.

Cindy is great, she is really laid-back about the whole thing. She tells us their slogan, "we bring light to the dark." Ok, so first they wax the "area" before they bleach it. This is called, "waxing the winker." They actually give the customers the product to take it home with it. You are supposed to apply it frequently so that you will be pristine. It can sting, but it is not supposed to.

Brad, unfortunately, asks about those women who are not in the best shape when they come in. Cindy jokes that if they come in like that again, she'll get a saddle and ride them into the parking lot. Well, Cindy is an interesting lady, who knows far too much about this region.

Surprisingly, a third of their clients for this are men. Furthermore, 1/4 of her customers overall use the service. They even have a sign up with a picture in the store. Shockingly, porn stars are some of their best customers. Who else would really need this?

They also do six types of bikini wax. Recently, they have a done a Christmas tree and a Hanukkah bush. Well, isn't that festive? Thanks Cindy for coming through for us at the last minute. You can check out her salon at pinkcheeks.com.

So, the question is now, what is the weirdest procedure you have ever had done? There isn't much more bizarre things than the bleaching. Brad brings up those people who get a limb amputated as a sexual fetish. That is so weird.

Chris tells us about some allergy testing he had. They looked at his ears, and they had some major fluid in them. So, he needed his ears cleaned. Of course, Chris gets the only attractive woman in the whole place. So, to do this, they fill your ears with warm water, and then scrape it out. Ewwwww. Supposedly, it took forever.

Mike in SF tells us that he had to get a ladybug extracted from his ear as a child . Their method of extraction, after lots of probing, they submerge him in water to get it to crawl at.

Jesse in Petaluma says that he had to get melted plastic pulled off his eye. Holy crap. That is horrendous. I can't even imagine how painful that would be. Somehow, he didn't really damage his eye. That is insane.

8pm: We get a bunch of calls on these procedures. I don't feel so well now.

- Rachel from Antioch said her son fell off a countertop and tore his testicles open. Oh my.
- Mike from Byron had to get metal and rust removed from his eye. He is a welder and they had to drill the rust out.
- Terry in Danville has an awful story about a botched procedure. He had a screw left in his arm for too long. The doctor tried to take it out in his office. The bone had overlapped the screw, and on a local anesthetic, had the doctor file down the bone. He got so sick that he had to be taken to the ER.
- Dan in Oakland has a story that is not his own. He is a paramedic and saw a man at the hospital with one of the most bizarre injuries I have heard of. He had a nut (like bolt and nut) caught on his penis. They had to grind it off while the man is screaming. That is insane.

The last one wraps this up perfectly. Bobbi in SF is a nude dancer. She had a growth on her "winker" that she had to have removed. To do this, they injected the protrusion with a giant needle for anesthesia. And then, the doctor snipped it off, with something similar to wire cutters. I gotta give props to Bobbi for being cool enough to call in on this.

Brad admitted on Monday that he had lost his street credit at a remote in the Tenderloin. This has not set well with him. So, he is now making a concerted effort to gain it back. The first step is to turn down everyone for cigarettes. He even turned down two really hot girls that approached him. That is impressive determination.

9pm: Chris continues his retelling of Brad's actions today. A test was sent to Brad today. A woman appeared at the store, and they think she may have been an employee. She is exactly Brad's type. He has to tell her how beautiful he thinks she is, but swears he doesn't want to hit on her. But, by the time he convinces Chris of what he wants to do, she has disappeared. He looks around for about 30 minutes, trying to find her.

Although Brad is not able to find her, in his searching at Circuit City, the guys get to see the new gaming systems on plasma tv. They say that the graphics are just unreal.

Anyway, everything at the remote today goes really well. They give away the Tom-Tom to listener, Phillip, who is really excited. He is a really nice guy and decides to give it away as a Christmas present to his father. His father needs it, because he has dementia at 80 years old. The thing is, there is no way that this man should be driving, and now the guys have assisted in keeping him on the road.

Listener Jeff stopped by and gave them an advanced copy of his new book. It is tips to survive in SF on a student's budget. The thing is, it reads like it has been written by John Madden. He says that to go on a date, you have to meet someone. WOW. That's how you do it. Oh Jeff, you just sound like a mooch.

He recommends Craigslist, motorcycles, 2-buck chuck, and making friends with drug dealers. For his bike, he says that he fills the tank with acetone. Yeah, apparently this is a bad idea. I would spout off about that, but I don't know what acetone is.

I'm glad I didn't say anything about this, because apparently Chris and Brad were completely wrong. Adding acetone, according to the Internet, is actually a pretty common practice. Derrick from Pacifica calls in and says that acetone has been really helpful to him. You are supposed to put in a few capfuls. This would be great, but I'm pretty afraid to try this. He says you notice nothing different, except for the mileage.

Sean in Livermore claims that he has tested acetone. He has found no improvement whatsoever. Sean goes on about all the reasons why, but I have to say, this was far too technical for me. All I know, is that I am not putting nail polish remover in my car.

Andre from San Jose claims that putting ginger in the radiator, sealed the leak. This is really bizarre. I have never heard about that.

10pm: We get a call from Paul in Santa Clara. He has been a mechanic for 31 years. He tells me that my price on my work was good, so I'm happy.

Ginger in the Radiator: Anything that will make a slime when mixed with coolant will work. This is as long as you don't have a puncture.

Acetone for Fuel Efficiency: It's a no go, as it is terrible for old engines and will hurt your rubber seals.

I would like to explain his answer for fuel efficiency, but I didn't understand a word he said. That's why I have a mechanic, because I know NOTHING about cars. Paul is just way too smart for the room, because Chris and Brad are completely lost as well.

So, anyway, Evel Knievel is in the news. Didn't expect that. Even further, I didn't expect that the other celebrity in this story would be Kanye West. Apparently, Knievil is suing Kanye over a music video. From the Guardian Unlimited, he said, "That video that Kanye West put out is the most worthless piece of crap I've ever seen in my life, and he uses my image to catapult himself on the public." Umm, yeah, say what you want about Kanye, but he doesn't need Evel Knievel for fame.

The guys get an email from a listener named Mike. He went to Circuit City on Van Ness, and couldn't find them. He was utterly disappointed, because they said that they didn't know what he was talking about. That's sad.

We get another email from Rhino. He tells us about a place in Newark that has fried rice with their omelettes. He also loves Denny's sparking again this debate between Chris and Brad. The only good thing about Denny's is that it is everywhere and you know what you're getting. What killed Denny's for me was those damn Lenny's commercials. Ugh, I hated those.

Brad actually has a Penile Euphemism today. It has been quite a while since we had one of these. There is a preface, his wife is named "T," and probably wouldn't like it. It is "pillar of the communi-T." Read into that what you will.

So with that, we are done, and I apologize to my mother.